Good Night and Good Riddence

I think it was Jeff Foxworthy who said, “If you can’t think of anything nice to say, you’re probably talking about Hillary Clinton.”  My thoughts have been turning to the political lately, which is one of the reasons I haven’t been writing as much as I once did.  I don’t want my blog to become anything like a screed.  

One topic that has occupied me of late is the growing concern over the conduct of our soldiers and Marines in Iraq.  My opinions remain largely unformed on the subject, and that’s all I’ve got to say about that.

There is a tradition that seems prevalent in some of the blogs I read is the Commentary On Dumbass Celebrities, and though I myself have not taken part in this tradition (largely focused on TomKat and BrAngelina), an event took place today which compels me, and in that vein, I’d like to share a few thoughts with you.

It is my sad duty to report to you that Dan Rather has left CBS in a huff.  Dan described a “protracted struggle” with network executives who had “not lived up to their obligation to allow me to do substantive work.”  

Time for a quick review: Without expecting him to do any real work, CBS has been continuing to pay Dan Rather his very hefty salary, after sidelining him in the wake of a national scandal he created by airing a report which was at best poorly reported and unsubstantiated, and was eventually discredited – his report on the president’s military service during the Vietnam War.  Sure, Rather stepped down voluntarily from his position as anchor, but at that level, people never get fired, they’re simply offered the opportunity to leave of their own accord.

It’s a tradition, you see, to allow people who have attained a certain rank and degree of notoriety to salvage a bit of dignity at the end they themselves brought about.  Just like the captain of a warship that rammed another vessel, he was told, “Dude, you’re a fuckin’ psycho, and we’d feel more comfortable if you’d just leave.”

Only he wouldn’t leave.  He just hung around.

For their part, CBS executives have been pretty cool about the whole thing.  CBS News and Sports President Sean McManus complimented Rather by invoking Edward R. Murrow and Walter Cronkite.  He also said, “I had one of our interns put shortcut icons for Solitaire and Minesweeper on Dan’s Windows desktop, but the guy just can’t take a hint,” though this remark has not been widely reported.

Dan, I have a couple things for you to think about:  

First, journalism is, on the surface at least, all about image.  As we used to say on USS COWPENS, “An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.”  All you had to do, all you had to do, was appear to be telling us the truth, and we’d have cried over your retirement as we did 25 years ago when Cronkite chose his sailboat over the anchor’s desk.
Second, when someone is paying your salary, they get to define the expectation of satisfactory performance.  You were allowed to fuck up on a grand scale, in public, and leave with your salary and your corner office intact.  In Japan, you’d have been banished to the subway with a thousand ribbons pinned to your suit instructing passersby to scream at you about your foolish arrogance.  If you were in any way related to us mere mortals here in the US, the only way you could have prevented your ass from being escorted to the door by CBS Security would have been to pull a Tyler Durden-est-ce-que self-ass-kicking before they got to McManus’ office.

Nope, you got to keep your multi-million dollar salary with no expectation beyond you taking the spanking.  

So let’s get this straight:  You. Fucked. Up.  You did.  And you know you did, because your fallacious report impugned an unpopular president, which rules out politics as the reason you had to leave.  You were, were, powerful enough, respected enough, that Bush wouldn’t have had the political capital to have you fired if there’d been even the tiniest shred of truth to that report.  No, you had to leave because you had compromised your own integrity, and your continued presence would have compromised the integrity of the entire CBS news organization.

And yet you storm out four months before the end of your contract, as petulant and demanding as an ill-disciplined child.  Why did any of us ever respect you?

*        *        *

When I read that news story, the Reuters piece that quoted Rather’s bitter departure, I came to a pair of unpleasant realizations: first, that this was the reason I never liked Dan Rather in the first place and that the feeling I always had was finally vindicated and second, that people like Rather are everywhere in positions of power and prestige here in America.  That leaders who live by maxims like, “The buck stops here,” and, “A good plan executed now is better than a perfect plan next week,” and, “Ask not what your country can do for you…” are conspicuous only by their absence.  That Dan Rather actually is what’s wrong with this country.

Our national motto officially remains, “E pluribus unum”, once proclaimed with strength and pride by all who lived here, and with envy by many who didn’t.  Now, at least in practice, our motto seems to be, “You must respect me!” in a voice like Droopy the Dog’s.  Hell, even people here illegally demand our respect, as if it’s a guarantee that comes with placing the bottoms of one’s feet on American soil.

Edward R. Murrow, indeed.  If Murrow’s life teaches us anything, it’s that respect must be earned, and integrity is a precious commodity that must never be left unguarded.